When that happens, finding your way back to sanity, let alone clarity, can feel nigh impossible.

Here are three quick tips to help you find your way back to a resourceful, intuitive space when you lose your way:

1. Get help to remember who you are.
Deep down, you know and remember that you are a creative, resourceful, inspired being here with important work to do on the planet. From time to time, you simply forget that truth.

When that happens, turn to your supportive friends or to your coach or mentor for a bracing jolt of “wake up” to remind you that yes, you are a good person, you do have value, and you do have important work to do.

2. Take a step back.
When you’re in the throes of debate with your inner critic, it’s impossible to be creative or inspired. Everything feels too hard and too heavy.

This is a perfect time to take a step back, shake off the woollies, and do something wonderfully supportive for yourself, like taking yourself out for breakfast, receiving body work from a grounded, supportive practitioner, or even taking a luxurious soak in a hot tub.

3. Connect with your Muse, the Universe, or your Higher Self when you’re ready for guidance.
Once you know who you are again and you’ve refilled your own well, check in with your Muse, the Universe, or your Higher Self for guidance about what’s next.

Use the tools of wondering, daydreaming, collaging, and journaling to cast a WIDE net of exploration and possibility. Ask your inner critic to hold the questions for later, when it’s time to refine your plan and make it practical.

It’s All About Your Vision
Remember, at this Vision stage of the game, you first have to get in touch with WHAT you want, before you start working on the How. Learning how to renew and recharge to stay in touch with your inner creativity and resourcefulness will help you tap the greater wisdom you have about what you are here to offer.

What’s Jenna doing?

~> Coming Soon! Exciting new changes for the Sensitive Professionals Network. Watch this space for details.

~> Spring 2010. Give Voice to Your Inner Vision Mastermind Retreat (in-person). Dates to be announced. Clarify your unique vision to implement your Life Purpose in a specific, step-by-step plan.

Perhaps you’re wondering what a hand reading is or why you might want one. Or maybe you’re wondering why I’ve started doing them and how woo-woo they are, anyway?

Here’s what I want you to know:

I trained to do Life Purpose hand readings because when I had a hand reading myself 2 years ago, I was completely blown away with the accuracy of it.

… there were so many key aspects of my deeper self that the hand reading called out and recognized — parts of me I’ve kept hidden, even from myself.

For instance, I have gift markings that show my innate leadership, writing and speaking abilities, and drive to be “in the spotlight” (a big deal for a sensitive soul to own!).

I have life purpose markings that call out my inner drive to guide, lead, support and mentor others, AND to do it in a big, big way with great success.

I also have life lesson and life “school” markings that show exactly what I struggle with (trust and self-sacrifice) and what to do about it.

The reading spoke to that deeper part of me that knows I’m here to contribute in a big way, stand out, AND do it in a way that honors my intuitive, empathic, and creative gifts.  It also gave me powerful clues on what to work on so I can achieve that higher vision for myself.

** What will your hands say about you? **

You can book a hand reading through the end of the day today for only $297, after that the investment goes up to $497. These sessions are also available at an even better rate when you and a friend sign up together; a 2-for-1 Valentine’s month treat.

With each reading, you’ll receive a hand printing kit in the mail (good news: we don’t have to meet in person for me to read your hands , a private 40 minute phone session with me, an MP3 recording of the session, and a personal summary report of your results.

You’ll also receive the deep, soul-level validation of finally being seen for who you really are.

I’d love to do this for you.

You can book your reading and find out more here: http://www.highlysensitivesouls.com/handswithjenna.htm

PS — And no, this system of analysis is not particularly woo-woo; it’s actually a repeatable method of analyzing your fingerprints and  hand prints to determine your gifts, purpose, lessons, and “school,” truly invaluable information for getting you back on your true path.

It was one of those funny self-coaching moments, because I realized that I was balancing my own stimulation levels, something I often coach sensitives to do.

In the end I chose the spread-out method and it worked out well.

It reminded though, of how important it is for sensitive types to give conscious thought to how we use our time and energy, and how it can be different from one day to the next. (One size doesn’t fit all.)

So next time you’re feeling overwhelmed with scheduling choices, remember YOU get to decide what works best for you in the moment.

Our spirit is our Essence, our life force, our energy.

When it is gone, we feel checked out, dry, and deflated.

Our spirits leave for good reason — usually when we are off our path, trying to force ourselves to do something we think we “should” do, or just plain old pushing ourselves too hard and getting exhausted.

When that happens, your spirit says, “No, thanks, I’m outta here.”

Our spirits also leave when we don’t take the time to properly nurture and care for ourselves on all fronts. It’s so easy for sensitive and creative types to get caught up in our pursuits of ideas, spirituality, creativity, and personal growth “work” that we don’t take the time to remember to daydream, take care of our bodies, rest, eat well, sleep, and PLAY. We have to remember to savor and enjoy life too, along the way.

And, yes, for all of you (me too) high-achieving sensitive souls out there, all those things are actually productive because they are what allow us to do our Work in the world. When the well is full, it can spill over abundantly with creativity and productivity.

Another reason I see our spirits leave is when we are relentlessly hard on ourselves, not giving ourselves the chance even to take action on our creative dreams and visions because we are so busy wrestling with our inner critics.

So if you’ve been feeling down, out-of-sorts, unmotivated, uninspired, or lost, ask Karla McLaren’s powerful question, “Why has my spirit gone?” You may discover something you’ve been doing (or not doing) that’s sent your inner self off on vacation and left the gremlins in charge.

To bring your spirit back, try this technique I learned from my wise teacher, Sonia Choquette:

Find a trusted friend and share about what your spirit loves, for at least two minutes each, out loud. The other person simply holds the space for your sharing, just listening, without comment, feedback, or interaction.

If you don’t have someone to work with, say “My spirit loves…” out loud to yourself in the shower or in the mirror. It’s a powerful way to get back in touch with yourself quickly.

Use your answers to create a list you can use “in case of emergency.”

Then, pick something from your list, and do it.

Let me know how it goes, okay?

What’s Jenna doing?

~> Early Spring 2010. Exciting new changes for the Sensitive Professionals Network. Watch this space for details.

~> Spring 2010. Voice Your Vision Mastermind Retreat (in-person). Dates to be announced.

Case in point: I love Trader Joe’s “Vegetable Biryani,” but I know that when I eat anything that isn’t fresh, it affects my vibration. So, after a collaboration last year with the talented and intuitive Mindy Mortlock of www.ConsciousTable.com, I created my own Indian spice mix that I could use to make my own biryani.

I put it together the other day with all the same essential ingredients (rice, apples, raisins, peas, spices), cooked it the same way, and it tasted similar (but better).

What I noticed was how differently I felt when I ate it — it wasn’t just the flavor or quality of the food that was different, it was the vibration of it as well. And not only that, but MY vibration was different. I felt more energized, lighter, cleaner, even clearer.

In a pinch, I “take a ‘bad’ food and make it better” — I add organic fresh veggies and other tweaks to improve the nutritional value of what I’m eating, but it’s just not the same as starting from scratch.

I encourage you to try this yourself and see what you notice — pick out a “fast” food (I rarely eat true fast food but I count TJ’s items in that category now) and make a homemade version of it yourself.

Plus, see if you can find ways to make it “fast” even at home. I made a big batch of rice the other morning and then had that on hand to make 3 other meals. Talk about a time saver. My other favorite fast food trick is to freeze big batches of slow food stews and soups we can easily reheat on demand.

The bottom line is that what you eat affects your energy and therefore your ability to be yourself in the world.

The subtle vibration does matter.

Thanks for sharing your comments below. I love to read them.

This week’s article focuses on some additional “addictions” that can get in your way from living your Life Purpose, and perhaps more importantly, from living your life.

1. Worrying

In addition to mind candy, another addiction that keeps us from moving forward on our path is worrying, as if that will help us in any way (I’m a world-class worrier, I should know).

This pitfall keeps us stuck in paralyzing fear. Often this gets organized around “But HOW will I?” (that’s not your first job — it’s WHAT), and “But what will I?” (Trust me, you won’t answer that question playing Farmville), and “But I don’t know enough yet” (the only solution to that problem is to take action and get involved).

Things we worry about: paying our bills, our relationships, our kids, other people’s stories (none of our business), and our dramas.

What you can do instead: Ask for Divine guidance and support (some people call that praying), and use the techniques I mentioned in last week’s article to figure out your What.

2. Self-Doubt and Sabotage

Or we get stuck in “I don’t have enough money” and “I don’t have enough time.”

Let me confess to you right now, that if I’d been writing 15 minutes a day for the last two years the way my spirit has been requesting of me, I’d have a book written by now (or maybe even two) — I’m not perfect either.

Bigger self doubts: “No one is interested in what I have to offer” or “No one will like it” (that’s actually none of your business either).

What you can do instead: Take small, micro actions to move yourself forward, no matter what.

3. Believing You Have to Do It Alone

If we’re really too busy to find the time to uncover or take action on our Life’s Purpose, we simply have to find a way to make that happen.

So often we get involved in doing tasks that we believe we have to do, when really, we could be delegating them.

When we don’t delegate, we don’t free up our time to take action on the Big Stuff.

This could look like not hiring a housekeeper or childcare, not getting expert coaching or support, or not delegating less important tasks like bookkeeping, web design, filing, email, cooking, errands.

(We do have to make sure we’re using our time wisely when we delegate.)

What you can do instead: Identify the tasks that are draining you and find someone to hand them off to, and/or get the support you need from people who’ve been where you want to go.

Know that you may not actually be the best person to do them — See my other article, “Is That Your Work To Do?” for additional thoughts on this subject.

4. Holding Back Out of Habit or Fear

Sometimes we get so used to playing small that we don’t even realize we’re doing it anymore.

We set glass ceilings for ourselves, like making assumptions about how much money we can make, how much (or how little) people will be interested in our work, how willing we are to take creative risks, be vulnerable, and real.

I want you to know that it doesn’t serve you or the world to play small. See my post “A Thanksgiving Blessing” for more thoughts and inspiration.

What you can do instead: Look for where you are holding back and check it out with yourself. Does it serve your greatest vision for yourself and the hold to be holding back in this way?

Have a wonderful week!

What’s Jenna doing?

~> February 11th. Jenna will be leading a Virtual Workshop called “5 Steps to Get You Back On Track With What You Were Put Here To Do.” Meet your Essential Self and discover your Life Purpose.

~> Early Spring 2010. Exciting new changes for the Sensitive Professionals Network. Watch this space for details.

~> Spring 2010. Voice Your Vision Mastermind Retreat (in-person). Dates to be announced.

Before we get started, here are two key things you need to know:

1. The first key is to understand that your Life Purpose is different than your career or your “niche.”

Your Purpose is the overarching raison d’etre (your reason for being) of your life, and can be expressed in many ways. My own purpose, “Big Shot Mentor” can clearly be expressed in many different genres or arenas, right? But the big Why is about being a leader and mentor in a big, big way.

2. The second key is to understand that your Life Purpose comes from your soul, not from your mind.

Because your Life Purpose is a soul-driven, spirited calling, I strongly suggest avoiding career assessments and heavily intellectually-based tools. This information needs to come from your spirit, not from your good ideas about what you “should do.”

Here are some possible pathways to help you discover your Life Purpose:

Option 1: Focus on listening to your inner voice.

If you have trouble hearing your inner voice, use these tools to get yourself into an open, inspired, positive space and see what comes out for you when you:

• Daydream, brainstorm, journal, collage, and diagram about what you LOVE, what you WOULD love, what’s next for you, and what inspires you.
• Meditate.
• Light candles, burn incense, pray, and wonder.
• Exercise, walk, dance, do yoga, or run.
• Lie on your back and look up at the sky to open your mind and shift your perspective (you’ll never find your dreams sitting at your desk).
• Journal about these questions: What are you called to? What’s sparks your interest? What secret dreams have you harbored (particularly since you were a child)?

These may sound simple, but honestly, you cannot spend your time more wisely than tuning in creatively to your deepest self and seeing what answers emerge. Again, it’s important to stay in an open, creative, intuitive space rather than letting your brain run the show. Your results will percolate over time, and may require some interpretation, but will begin to point you in the right direction.

Option 2: Visualize your Purpose.

Allow yourself to get into a deeply relaxed state and ask yourself:

• What do I see myself doing when I’m at my very best?
• When I imagine myself expressing what am I here to do, what do I see, hear, feel, and experience myself doing?

Give yourself about 5 minutes to first get yourself completely relaxed, then ask these questions and see what comes to you. Focus on the deeper meaning and message of any images that come to you, rather than interpreting literally if you find the exact images or information confusing.

The Life Purpose process I used for my former coaching program was organized around such a visualization. Because I’ve been hearing from people about wanting other methods to access your Purpose, I’m looking at making it available as a self-study tool within the next few weeks (leave me a comment below if this interests you).

Option 3: Get a Numerology or Hand Reading

Two of the best tools I’ve seen for determining Life Purpose are numerology or hand readings. I prefer hand readings myself, of course (why else would I have chosen to learn how to do them?), but both are powerful, accurate, and useful systems to help you get information about what you are here to do and why.

From a hand reading you can expect to learn your Life Purpose, your Life School, and your Life Lesson. What I find truly fascinating about hand analysis readings is how they often both validate what people already know to be true AND call them forward in a higher way.

Together these tell you not only what you are here to do, but also what you are here to learn, and how you will learn it. Because we teach what we’re here to learn, knowing your Lesson is equally important as knowing your Purpose.

Numerology readings give similar results.

Pull It All Together

Once you’ve got even the barest bones of ideas together, play with crafting a statement of Life Purpose to guide you.

Here’s mine for inspiration: “My Life Purpose is to be a successful, creative, visionary mentor serving others to honor their own visions by passionately leading the way to creative expression.”

I hope you’ve found this helpful to get you started on your path to discovering your purpose.

If you’re wanting help with finding your own Life Purpose, I’d love to have you join me for my upcoming course, “5 Steps To Get You Back On Track With What You Were Put Here To Do.”

Not only will you learn your Purpose, you’ll also discover who you REALLY are at a deep, Essential level; the unique formula you need for fulfillment and satisfaction, and the first steps you need to take to get back on your true path.

There’s still an early registration savings of $300 you can take advantage of by this Wednesday, February 3 at midnight Eastern. You can find out more, here.

Despite the rain, my husband and I got out to celebrate our 3rd wedding anniversary on Sunday with a real “date” out to a movie (Sherlock Holmes), Thai noodles, and amazing bread pudding at the Claremont Hotel in Berkeley. My mom was a star babysitter.

We also dared the airways with our 2 year old son to get to a retreat in Florida with my platinum coach, Bria Simpson, earlier in the month. It was a huge success — from both the travel and coaching perspectives (always bring sock puppets!).

Bria Simpson and Jenna Avery

Our Platinum Group
(I’m in the back on the left)

When my son fell and we had to dash off to the emergency room to get stitches for him, I was reminded of how intensely we sensitive souls feel EVERYTHING. We’re all still unwinding from it even today.

It was also interesting to notice how I so naturally tuned in empathically to my son and how upset he was. I had to make a highly conscious effort to get grounded and shift into a space where I could be there for him without getting caught up in feeling it with him, poor little guy.

Luckily, he seems to be healing well so far.

The craziness was intensified by our car battery being dead when we got in the car to go to the hospital, but my husband easily remedied that by jumping the battery. Whew!

Anyway, I’m telling you all this because it was such a good reminder to me of how intense experiences are at least quadruply intense for sensitive souls and how we have to allow ourselves time to regroup and recover as needed. I spent some time curled up in bed yesterday in a dark room to rest up.

In the midst of all this, when we got home I found that my email box was jammed with spam and bouncing messages back to people writing me. Normally, I would have found that upsetting, but in this context it wasn’t such a big deal. Isn’t it intriguing to get a new perspective on things?

So, if you wrote me (0r my team) within the last 24 to 48 hours, there’s a good chance we didn’t get it. Many apologies, and we look forward to hearing from you again.

It’s truly amazing the kinds of distractions we’ll come up with! As I write this article, I’m all too aware of the ways I use these addictions to avoid stepping up in an even bigger way.

As my client and I talked, we joked about the pitfalls of what I call “mind candy.” Mind candy is the stuff we feed our brains instead of doing our Work.

Mind candy is what we substitute for taking action — it keeps our intellects occupied with “thinking lite.” We do this instead of carving out the space for we need for inner deep sea diving to find the answers we really need or actually doing the work it takes to implement our purpose in our lives.

Usually when we do these things, we justify them with clever rationalizations.

My particular brand of mind candy is email, information, and technology. Before I do my Work, I often allow myself to:

• Answer and frequently check email: “I have to, right? It’s part of my business!”
• Search for more information: “I have to learn more about x before I can do y,” or “I need to know what so-and-so is doing.”
• Fiddle with my websites: “I’ve got to get that done first, right, before I can get it out to the world, right?”

Here’s what I need and want to be doing instead: The writing and creating that leads to the speaking, leading, and mentoring I’m here to do.

Here are some other examples of intellectual junk food you may be stuffing your head with:

• Facebook: Farmville seems like a particularly huge time suck for many people
• Twitter: “What’s everyone else doing so I can figure out what to do?”
• Internet surfing: Looking for answers, being restless seekers
• Watching television: “I deserve/I just need/I just want to take a break”
• Reading: Yes, even reading can be a check out.
• Tuning into the news: “I have a responsibility to stay current with what’s happening in the world.”
• Worrying: If we’re worrying it’s hard to be creative and is in many ways a justification for not taking action
• Getting caught up in fear and doubt: “I’m not good enough,” and “I don’t know how.”
• Telling ourselves we have other things we have to do first: Get a website up, learn more, get more training, clean the house, organize the sock drawer, etc.
• Perfecting: Endlessly editing, tweaking, and adjusting rather than going for it and learning as you go.

Here’s the thing: While there’s nothing wrong with many of these activities, IMHO, the sticking point is when we substitute them for taking action on living our Life Purpose.

Of course some of these can be ways to take breaks (though deep down I think we all know there are better ways to take restful breaks — see below).

As the great Morpheus said to Neo in The Matrix, “Clear your mind.”

Frankly, we’re so programmed around “staying busy” that it’s a wonder we ever move forward with what we love. We simply have to have quiet space and down time to be productive in a useful way that keeps us on our path.

The paradox is that because we don’t know how to “do” quiet space and down time, we stuff ourselves with mind candy.

Here’s What You Can Do Instead To Get Yourself Back On Track

Here’s my two cents about what’s worth doing instead, especially if you feel like you don’t know what to do:

• Find out who you REALLY are and what you were put here to do (my 5 Steps class can help with this).
• Daydream, brainstorm, journal, collage, and diagram about what you LOVE, what you WOULD love, what’s next for you, and what inspires you.
• Meditate.
• Light candles, burn incense, and pray.
• Work with your coach or mentor to uncover, discover, and take action on your Life’s Purpose.
• Exercise, walk, dance, take yoga, or run, (get your sluggish energy moving).
• Lie on your back and look up at the sky to open your mind and shift your perspective (you’ll never find your dreams sitting at your desk).

The common denominator here is that these “inspiring actions” all help you tap into your deepest intuitive and spiritual guidance about your life, instead of trying to run the show with your mind.

Remember Albert Einstein’s wisdom, “The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.”

Related Posts: “How to Get Around To Doing What Really Matters To You.”

What’s Jenna doing?

~> February 11th. Jenna will be leading a Virtual Workshop called “5 Steps to Get You Back On Track With What You Were Put Here To Do.” Meet your Essential Self and discover your Life Purpose. Registration is still open.

~> Early Spring 2010. Exciting new changes for the Sensitive Professionals Network. Watch this space for details.

~> Spring 2010. Voice Your Vision Mastermind Retreat (in-person). Dates to be announced.